


Dare or Penny Can (aka the joys of tequila wine)

by slagsmacker



Category: Cougar Town
Genre: F/F, Threesome - F/F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-31
Updated: 2011-03-31
Packaged: 2017-10-17 10:18:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/175786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slagsmacker/pseuds/slagsmacker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It may be the Tequila Wine talking, but Laurie is super glad her first threesome doesn’t involve Dale with a video camera.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dare or Penny Can (aka the joys of tequila wine)

**Author's Note:**

> Another one for the Livejournal Porn Battle. Set sometime in season one, before Grules (get back in your spaceship!) exists.

“Dayum old lady, you are going to town!”

Laurie feels this is pretty much the nicest thing she has ever said to Ellie. That doesn’t stop Grandma from wiping her mouth, rolling her eyes, then biting Laurie (hard) on the inside of her, ‘lumberjack,’ gams.

“No talking Jellybean,” Ellie snaps out.

 _Whatever_ , Laurie thinks. There had been a no touching rule too, but Jules had got mad at Ellie for slapping everyone’s hands away, so that had gone out the window.

Jules stumbles back into the room, another glass of moonshine (Dale had called it Tequila Wine, but Laurie’s kinda worried it is made out of petrol and their hair will fall out) clutched in her hand. She obviously forgot what was going down in her bedroom, because her eyes pop when she sees Ellie’s head bobbing between Laurie’s drumsticks.

Laurie would feel bad, but this is kinda all Jules’ fault. Okay, so she brought the Tequila Wine...but that normally ends in parties where she has to take her fake nails off before beating down some ho. The whole naked lady pile-on is happening because the Golden Girls know each other too well and got bored of playing Truth or Penny Can. Like a normal person Laurie had wanted to go to a club, Ellie said she would rather die, then Jules suggested Dare or Penny Can to shut them both up.

So yeah, if anyone asks, totally not Laurie’s mess. It’s like that time she accidentally shot her step-dad…. _yes_ she’d been pointing the air-gun, but her Mom had loaded it and promised to give her candy if she pulled the trigger.

In this instance, Jules (who’s built like a teeny, tiny ant, so was, and is, slammed) had totally loaded the sucker. She’d obviously been waiting for Ellie to miss a shot and, when it happened, had clapped her hands in glee and dared her to kiss Laurie. Ellie had looked at her in disgust, ‘No thanks, don‘t want to catch white trash tonight.’ However, as soon as Laurie had threatened to leave her dragging in their dust, then pushed her own, ‘mouth that looks like a toilet plunger,’ against Jules’, she’d done it.

And now, somehow, here they are. Ellie (for once) using her mouth for good, Laurie feeling all empowered, and Jules watching them both from the doorway.

Sensing her presence (Travis once taught Laurie the word co-dependant and she thinks it fits), Ellie lifts her head and beckons Jules over,

“Thank god you’re back, I need someone to make sure she doesn’t suffocate me with her _ginormous_ thighs.”

Laurie would complain about unnecessary meanness, but, in a bedroom setting, their bickering kind of works.

 Jules (who still hasn’t taken her ridiculous shoes off) totters over and stumbles down onto the bed. She seems transfixed by the way Laurie’s boobs are swaying slightly as Ellie picks up the pace, and Laurie congratulates herself on having a pretty awesome rack. Reaching out a hand, Jules takes the weight of one breast in her fingers and pouts wistfully,

 “So perky,”

Laurie hopes Jules is not about to have one of her, ‘I’m forty-something and single,’ breakdowns, because the feel of a hand against her nipple is getting her _really_ close. Then again, on a scale of one to meltdown, they have been pretty good about not freaking out. Laurie doesn’t want to try and guess what is going on in Ellie’s robot brain, but she’s a little surprised Jules has been almost cool. As far as Laurie knows, this could be something the co-dependency (vocab, score!) twins do all the time. They might even have had some weird suburban swinger thing going on before the divorce…. Laurie’s Mom once had one of those arrangements…it _would_ explain Andy’s insane love for Bobby.

Ellie has started to draw her tongue in a figure of eight (clit, entrance, in and back again) along Laurie’s lady bits. Laurie feels like this might be something they teach you at fancy lawyer school, because no boyfriend has ever gone down on her like this before. Jules is still palming her boob. Of course, trying to not play favorites, she also sloppily strokes Ellie’s hair.

It may be the Tequila Wine talking, but Laurie is super glad her first threesome is with two incredible women and doesn’t involve Dale with a video camera.

She comes with an arch of her back (WA-BAM) and thinks hazily _my friends are awesome._


End file.
